i read an article in the Jewish Press several years ago that disturbed me then and recently, someone brought up the issue again. it was the true story of an orthodox man in Brooklyn who was married and had a concubine- also a jewish woman. the wife knew about the concubine and was alright with it. The couple had kids who where in their teens and the husband had his concubine since they were little. Is this allowable? This doesn't sound right!

Dear Sarah,

I believe it was also in Time magazine which printed the actual relevant responsa in Hebrew from two hundred years ago.

Briefly, the Rabbis disapproved of anyone living with his wife without a ketuvah which is a Rabbinical ordinance. According to biblical law (as obvious to anyone reading the bible), having a wife without a written contract (the ketuvah) was permitted. She has all of the rights and priviledges of a wife, just she hasn't got a written contract with the various benefits the Rabbis added on to protect the woman. Now some Rishonim were not clear if this promulgation still excludes a woman from becoming a wife without a contract (concubine). The Misnat Yaavetz (that appears in the Times article) which is a recent set of responsa, apparently says it is permitted in our time.

As for living with a woman who you do not marry with or without a contract, this is called znut which of course we disapprove of since the Rabbis felt that in such a relationship the woman would not observe the laws dealing with family purity or get into complications with not knowing whose children are who.

Just to make a well known point clear, the children born to the concubine are his legitimate children and inherit the same as from the wife with a ketuvah. Illegitamate children who may not marry other jews are only those born of adultery or incest.

Aryeh Shore

What about the degree of Rabbenu Gershon? It is forbidden to have more than one wife.

hmm, I am not sure about allowable in our days in time. but there is nothing wrong with it. the askinizim (sp) jewry because of their chirstain neighbors accpeted the concept of one wife per husband. Some time latter the Sepharidim followed suit in the middle ages. howver up to then, it was common practice or i should say not unheard of for a man to have more then one wife. there was more detail to the matter however i don't remember the rest. nor is the concept of having more then one wife as grand as it sounds!

The Pilagshim that we're talking about are those that have no Kiddushin. All agree that they don't have Kesuva (which is a Machlokas TAnnayim (and Rishonim who to Paskin like) if it's from the Torah (Mahor HAbisulos)). So this is a Machlokis Rishonim if you can have without Kiddushin (so there is no problem of two wives) which Rabbi Emden gave his P'sak. However, most Poskim hold that it's Usser and need Kiddushin (see Biur Hagra that brings many proofs that a pilegesh is only with Kiddushin.) without Kiddushin, it's Znus, which some Rishonim say it's prohibitted from the Torah (Lo siya Kideisha.) The proponents of this pelagshim ae trying to find a loophole to permit a husband to make his wife an Agunah and continue to able to have his Taaveh fulfilled. The vast majority of Poskim denounce it. (Even like R' Emden, there are many conditions to fulfill, which in most cases they don't fulfill them.

Rav Chaim, i was commenting on R' Mitterhoff comment in dealing with more then one wife. as well i thought we realize the issue wasn't a Pilagshim since it was a matter of lost ketubah or somthing of that nature.

It is forbidden for us to have a Pilagshim unless we are a king of Israel (RamBam). Rashi and the RamBam makes a comment for the rest of us who are not the king of Israel that we may have a woman without any form of ketubah or kiddushin if she is our maidservent. however the thing is, she is still not a Pilagshim but rather a wife.

That's right, the Rambam prohibits non kings to marry a Pilegesh. But the Raavad argues and permits it. Hence you have the two Shitos in EH 26:1 in the Rama. R'Yaakov Emden's Heter is based on the view of the RAavad.

since such a practice most likly, as we see in our day and age turns the daughters of Israel into Harlots hoping bed to bed, which is forbidden.
thus the question is raise under what condition did they accpet this practice as permissiable? for under the right condition even the the RamBam accept the concept of a concubine for all the men of Israel.

quote:

What about the degree of Rabbenu Gershon? It is forbidden to have more than one wife.

Is it true that this decree is 'running out' soon, i.e. that it was only for x amount of years, which is coming to an end shortly. I heard it from an unreliable source and am wondering if it is true or not?

Shalom Gila,

Rabbeinu Gershom's edict technically ended around a century ago. The ashkenazim have kept it in force as something they have accepted upon themselves.

It might end after Moshiach's arrival, but I would be very surprised to see it end prior to that. After all, under the laws of dinah d'malchuta dinah, there wouldn't be anyplace to observe this, even for people for whom it would be appropriate.

PS. I have been quite impressed with what I have seen of your posting.

Regards, Eliahu

quote:

since such a practice most likly, as we see in our day and age turns the daughters of Israel into Harlots hoping bed to bed, which is forbidden.
thus the question is raise under what condition did they accpet this practice as permissiable? for under the right condition even the the RamBam accept the concept of a concubine for all the men of Israel.

First, look at my first post that most Shitos Paskin like RAmbam where this practice is prohibbited. See Gra in EH that brings many proofs to this. The Paskin like R'Emden against the Gra and most Shitos are only for people that are looking for loopholes. So Halachacily it wouldn't be permitted

But even to R' Emden, it would need to be on a husband and wife relationship, that shouldn't be broken unless some unseen problems, like any other marriage. But to go into it for a one nighter and try to legitimate it by caling it a Pilegesh, that is Prohibitted according to everybody.

So, what happens if the first wife wants out of the marriage because of his "infidelity"? If he doesnt want to give the Get, isn't she legally still his wife, albeit, unhappy? What if she denies him relations because he has been with another woman? Which Time Issue ran the article? I never saw it there - only in the New York Jewish Press some time ago.

Sarah, depending on the community and the sitution the Beit Din and force him to give her a get or vice a vesa.

second wife:

Sephardic jews were allowed second wives until the establishment of the State of Israel, when the first sephardic rabanin decided to go along with the askenazim. There is nothing permanent about this.

The edict of Rabbeinu Gershom is not all encompassing and does not apply in all cases, e.g. a shotgun wedding (nachat shiva) or being engaged to two women at the same time (shargas aryeh).

In the middle ages, the marriage contract stated that the husvand could not take a second wife without the first wife's consent.

In Israel, it is occaisionaly permiteed to take a second wife when for some halachic reason one can not divorce the first wife.

There is no concept of infidelity for men in Jewish law. Secualar jews are the ones who get upset if their husband betrays them.

Every law by its nature of defining something is by itself "unfair" to someone. However, the whole system weighs the rights of everyone concerned. For example, only the sons inherit not the daughters. On the other hand the father gives a substantial dowry to the daughter and not the son.



Aryeh Shore
New Rochelle

By the way, the Gemara in Peshachim 113a says that you should not marry two wives because they will conspire against you. But but if you do, you should marry a third wife so one of them will always inform you. It's hard to get three people to agree.

Quote:
Rab said to R. Assi: Do not dwell in a town in which no horses neigh or dogs bark. And do not dwell in a town where the leader of the community is a physician. And do not marry two women but if you do marry two, marry a third.

Dear RABBIS,
Please explain in detail: what is the meaning and halacha of Pilagshim for B'nai Noach? for example, the Torah sources say that Eliphaz ben Esav and Lavan ben Besuel had pilagshim. E.g., what is the difference between a regular wife and a pilagesh or a zonah for a Ben Noach? Is there a difference in the status of the children? Bilha and Zilpah, children of Lavan's pilagesh, where considered handmaids to his children from his wife, Leah and Rochel.
Dr. M. Schulman
Director, Ask Noah International
http://www.asknoah.org

quote:

PS. I have been quite impressed with what I have seen of your posting.

Thanks!

Rav Gershom's edict lapsed about a century ago. Also it was for Ashkenaz only and for a particular reason no longer existing. In general Sfaradi, Temani etc kehiloth did not accept the edict. Even so it was an uncommon practice in most areas.
There restrictions, such as the 1st wife must agree to have a "tsoreret" (2nd wife competing with her) and the man proving to the Beit Din that both wives and their children can be resonably well supported. Of course there is no permission for "one night stands" or the like.

Here in Israel there have been occassions when a Beit Din has permitted a "tsoreret". e.g. A temani whose wife turned out to be certifiably insane, tried to commit suicide & survived but was impossible to live with, yet also he could not divorce her because she was so crazy that she was deemed nonresponsible so that even her acceptance of a get would have no standing. The Beit Din gave a psak that she should live seperate from the family, & the unfortunate husband could marry another woman.
In Teiman it was quite usual for a man to have several wives of different ages. As one got too old to give birth easily he would marry a younger woman, & then another etc. They all lived together as one very big family usualy getting along all together quite well.

Would I give a psak on this question today? I hope to never be asked, because of the great controversy that has come about on it.
Bebirkoth haTorah
Rav Yaakov B

quote:

Please explain in detail: what is the meaning and halacha of Pilagshim for B'nai Noach?

Though I haven't really researched the subject well, but I don't think there is any difference Halachikly. Since there is not so many Halachos of a wife of a Ben Noach (There is no Kesuvah or Kiddushin) and all there is is bringing her in the house and to divorce is to send her out (which would be the definition of the lowest opinion of Pilagshim (the Raavad) by a Yisrael.) The Rambam (to my reculection) doesn't defrenciate between them. personally I think they were designated as a second class wife in general (thus their children were treated as second class. But I don't think there is any Nafka Minah L'Halacha.

I'll keep you posted if I see anything definite.

quote:

Originally posted by Rabbi Mitterhoff:
What about the degree of Rabbenu Gershon? It is forbidden to have more than one wife.

B"H
If I might speak somewhat about this subject, I have counted more than ten Yemenite Jewish men in the city of Rehovoth (Israel) with more than one wife! Not only in Yemen was this practice observed, but in a lesser way, it was also practiced in Morocco.In my conversations with Moroccan Jews here, in Israel, all have said to me with one accord that they too saw the practice of polygamy observed by Jews in Morocco, but then again it was always an exceptional case, since most Jews preferred marrying a single woman. The Jewish law allows, in particular, a Jewish man to take an additional wife over his first wife in the event that he lived with his first wife for ten years and she could not bring him any children. But this is not the sole rule, for many Jews who have co-wives also have children from both wives. I, myself, have counted ten Yemenite Jewish men in the city of Rehovoth who are married to two or more wives. Once, I was told by a teacher of mine that he and the entire city of Betar-Ilit (where he lives) were moved with awe and astonishment when a certain Yemenite man moved to their city with his four wives! (They have since departed from the city.) Yet, almost in all cases there is jealousy between the co-wives, as Gila once suggested, each vying for the love and respect of their husband. The common factor between all of these Yemenite Jews who are married to two or more co-wives is that they came up to this country from Yemen with their co-wives, since the secular law of the State today does not sanction such marriages when they are made within the country proper, and anyone marrying co-wives within the land of Israel is liable to a maximum prison sentence of five years! However, the State will recognize marriages of this kind when they are officiated outside of the territorial domain of the State of Israel. (Thus is it stated in the Israeli Penal Code Book.) I remember hearing once over the news on the radio that an Israeli man who had taken another wife in addition to his first wife, here, within the country, was caught and arraigned under the secular laws of the State. Note: The secular laws of the State prohibit polygamy among Jews, but permit polygamy among Arabs living within the State. The reason for this is because the secular law, in this particular matter, received the full backing and support of the religious Jews of Europe at the founding of the State in 1948. Primarily, it was they who controlled the Rabbinic Courts of the newly founded State, while they accepted and adhered to Rabbeinu Gershom's edicts wherein he prohibited polygamy amongst religious Jews. The Sephardic Jews have never accepted this prohibition. (Rabbeinu Gershom lived a little more than a thousand years ago in Europe, was a devout Jew, and one who made many new enactments for his generation, among which was the prohibition of marrying co-wives, and which prohibition was meant to be binding only for a thousand-year period. Although this period has since expired, the Ashkenazi Jews keep to their old traditions, and nowhere do they permit among themselves polygamy.) The Ashkenazi Jews, as said, adhered to his edicts, which explains why in the West no Jewish people engage in polygamy – for most Jews in the West (America and Europe) are derived from Ashkenazi extract. The State of Israel kept enforce the edicts of Rabbeinu Gershom, forcing this order upon all Jews living within the land of Israel. Yet, recognizing the differences between Sephardic and Ashkenazi customs in this matter, it permitted Sephardic Jews to return to their ancient homeland, accompanied by their co-wives. Today, a new generation of Israelis rarely sees this practice of polygamy because of the restrictions over this practice by the State, which explains the great awe and surprise by the religious people of Betar-Ilit when they saw the Yemenite man with his four wives. (By the way: In Yemenite Jewish culture, there is no stipulation made in the ketubah which would require prior consent from his wife before his taking another wife, or before his divorcing his present wife.)
Sincerely,
David