I have been taught that when you light Shabbos candles that you should always light at least two. One for the commandment to remember
the Sabbath day and keep it Holy. And another candle to observe the Sabbath day and keep it Holy. I have also read that if you are single you light only one, and if you are married you always light at least two, and one for each other family member, if possible. Is it true that if you are single you can only light one, or is it better for everyone to light at least two? Also, is it ever acceptable to light only one if you are married?

You should light at least two, like you wrote. It's a Minhag to add another after the birth of children. adding doesn't take away from the original amount, and you'll always have two in whatever amount you light.

Dear Rav Chaim:

Would you please also respond to the part of the original question for a single person to only light one candle?

Is this rule the same whether the single person is male or female?

How about if a married person who lit one while single and two while married gets divorced, do they ever go back to lighting one?

How about if a woman's custom while married to her first husband was to add a candle for each child, and after a divorce marries a man who prefers the custom of not adding a candle for each child, can she go back to lighting just two?

And what about those who might miss a Shabbos for whatever reason, and take on to add one candle for each Shabbos they missed lighting by candle lighting time, does Yom Kippur, or a second marriage, or annulment of vows, ever give her the opportunity to go back to just 2 candles?

Quote "Would you please also respond to the part of the original question for a single person to only light one candle?"

I'm not sure of this Minhag. The Shulchon Orech brings the Minhag of 2. I think that this is a misconception, that since you add on for every child, so the first two represents the parents. but this doesn't seem the case. The Minhag to add for each child is based on the assumption that the wife would miss lighting when the child is born, so needs to add another candle. (This is not needed really, since it would be an ONness, which they didn't K'nassed people to light extra for, which obviously doesn't apply for the parents.)

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The Minhag to add for each child is based on the assumption that the wife would miss lighting when the child is born, so needs to add another candle

That's so interesting that the two "reasons" for adding another candle are in fact related.

For those who add a candle per child, but in fact did NOT miss lighting for Shabbos within the week before or after the child was born, can they "use" this added candle without reason as a "get out of adding a candle" for a lo aleinu missed Shabbos for any other reason which would require adding a candle?

If a woman were attending to the needs of another woman who was imminently pregnant and was required to violate Shabbos to save the woman's life, such as driving her to the hospital, and attending to her needs during labor and delivery in the hospital, and the urgency came on before candle lighting time and ended well after the permissible time to light, would she be considered as one who forgot to light that Shabbos? Or since she was involved with a mitzvah that superceded Shabbos, she would be exempt from that additional candle on subsequent Shabbos?

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Or since she was involved with a mitzvah that superceded Shabbos, she would be exempt from that additional candle on subsequent Shabbos?

Most certainly. She's also missed it throuh an Onnes.

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can they "use" this added candle without reason as a "get out of adding a candle" for a lo aleinu missed Shabbos for any other reason which would require adding a candle?

No. Once they used an extra one (unless made with a Bli Neder) then becomes their amount, and by missing they're fined to light another candle.

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Or since she was involved with a mitzvah that superceded Shabbos, she would be exempt from that additional candle on subsequent Shabbos?


Most certainly. She's also missed it throuh an Onnes.

If this is the case, then why would a mother be expected to have missed a Shabbos lighting and need a fine?

The get-out-of-fine-for-oness principle only applies if she was exempt from Shabbos while her life is in danger, and not when she is for example immediately post partum and at risk of over-exertion from carrying around an infant?

Or perhaps we reason out that however many Shabbos lightings she misses under the category of false-labor through her return to a normal state, which might well be coincident with 2 months after a baby girl, they are totalled into a single fine of 1 additional candle?

If this is the case, if she misses 1 Shabbos lighting by false labor, 3 Shabbos in a row due to actual labor/delivery and a needy baby, lights one Shabbos on time, since the baby finally slept and gave her a little rest near Shabbos candle lighting time, and then she missed one or more Shabbos in a row since the kid realizes he fell asleep at the wheel and ima shouldn't become spoiled.... how many additional candles should she need according to the fine?

You're 100% right. That's why I wrote in the beginning that M'Iker Hadin She doesn't need to. Somehow, the Minhag came out that way. But in reality, there is no need to add any extras. Even false labors must be addressed, because we don't know they're false until they are finished. Sufek Pikuach Nefesh is also Doche all Mitzvos.

I have an additional question concerning candle lightning:
does halacha permitt to light the candles and actually bless them only somewhat later (10 minutes or so), after shabbes has actually started?
Thanx, Kol tuv

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Originally posted by Daniel K.:
I have an additional question concerning candle lightning:
does halacha permitt to light the candles and actually bless them only somewhat later (10 minutes or so), after shabbes has actually started?
Thanx, Kol tuv

The blessing is linked to the act of lighting the candles, so there musn't be any interruption between them. Ashkenazim make the blessing immediately after lighting the candles (as they hold that making the blessing (for a woman) brings in Shabbos and then the candles could no longer be lit), but I believe that Sefardim make the blessing before lighting.

I have also heard that a woman who knows of some particular need that cannot normally be done after candle lighting can specifically have in mind that she is not accepting Shabbos at time of candle lighting, and can then still do what is needed afterward.

And for a man, for example who drives to shul after candle lighting (and then might daven mincha still after that), doesn't accept Shabbos until a specific point in the Kabbalas Shabbos davening, or perhaps actually making Kiddush.

Does the initial 10 minute need fit into either of these categories?

Quote "I have also heard that a woman who knows of some particular need that cannot normally be done after candle lighting can specifically have in mind that she is not accepting Shabbos at time of candle lighting, and can then still do what is needed afterward."

OC 263:10 in Rama says she could make a condition, even if she thinks it. MB 44 says that she should only do it when she really needs to, since there are those who say that making a condition doesn't work

Quote "And for a man, for example who drives to shul after candle lighting (and then might daven mincha still after that), doesn't accept Shabbos until a specific point in the Kabbalas Shabbos davening, or perhaps actually making Kiddush."

Says that in MB 42, but adds that it's better to make a condition.

What's the Halacha for a single man in regards to lighting Shabbos/Yom Tov candles?

Why all this talk of the "fine" of lighting one or more extra candles? It seems more like a privilege - more beautiful, more holy - to light more rather than less. And the "burden" of "having" to light candles when you're tired from having an infant...I've had many sleep-deprived days and nights with little ones, and never found the few minutes required to light candles to be a burden! It's not as if someone asked me to carry a load of bricks to the other side of town! Actually, lighting the candles GIVES energy. How could it be considered other than an uplifting moment?

Nevertheless, Paulette, the Sages do call it a "knas" a fine. For someone who is very poor, having to light an extra light might indeed be financially stretching.

I also have a question, if I may. . .
Never having had a daughter before, I've not had to think about this, but does a girl also bentch licht along with her mother? (I believe Chabad has this minhag, but what about the rest of Torah Jewry?)

The rest of world jewry does not ahve daughters light. They are yoitzeh from the mother like the rest of the family.

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Originally posted by Sam-:
What's the Halacha for a single man in regards to lighting Shabbos/Yom Tov candles?

Also, can a single male rely on one's mother lighting even if the single male is not living with her?

No. They're considered different households.

Then does the mother stop lighting an extra candle for him, when he is grown and out of the house?