I was at a "leviah" today of a uncle.
The theme of the speeches were that he wasn't as simple as he may have seemed.In a few of the hespedim given by rabanim it was elluded that you could have thought he was a am haoretz.. on one side it was a very moveing leviah but at the same time it was a bit disturbing to me at what type of message was being sent.The rabanan seem to have made it clear what is the most preferable,that is to be talmud chacham.Not having such oppertunity is a real pitty.I felt it was a bit degrading for the nifter and for anyone else who is similar the nifter.Is the ammount of facts that a person know's a measureing stick?Of cource torah knowledge is very valuable but why make it sound like it is second best?There is so much to a person even without his career in learning.

Are you saying that someone doesn't need to be a Talmud Chuchum? Is it OK to skip the learning part and do "other things" and still be at the same level as the Talmud Chuchum?

Of course, Talmud Torah is K'neged Kulum. If someone is not someone who had the chance to learn, even for good reasons, it still is a pity that he wasn't Zoche to learn. Just like, of course on a greater scale, that someone was raised without the oppertunity to do Torah and Mitzvos (let say someone that was born and raised in the former USSR)is also a pity

I believe what he meant is that the amount of Torah a person knows is not the only yardstick to his greatness. A person who is involved in worldly pursuits can sometimes be a greater Tzaddik than a person who is learning all day.

Very true, thecnically, but this could technically be said for someone who eats traif can be a bigger Tzadik than a tamud Chuchum (giving the scenerio that he's aRotzeach and aBoal Arayos etc.). But giving that all else is in the boundries of regular acts of Bnai yisrael, it's hard to make up the Keneged Kulum, even if you do the rest (Kulum.)

I also don't know why if someone goes out in the world, he can't become a Talmud Chuchum. He's not working 24/7 for 90 years in a row. He only works 5 days a week from 9-5. He has th early hours and late hours. Shabbos and sunday there is no reason he shouldn't be learning 8 hours a day. Vacation time should also be spent learning. The early years in Yeshiva should be spent with the greatest care. You should also aim for early retirement so you can spend your golden years learning (which would mean living on a tight budget way within your means and saving good chunks for your retirement.) There are a lot of working people that take advantage of this and are Talmidai chachumim

could it pleased be explained the greatness of the study of the torah

hello dr.
the greatness of the study of torah can not be compare to anything. for even the all the mitzvah in the torah is not equivalent to a single word of TOrah. - Yerushalmi peah 1:1

for every mitzvah that is in the torah can only be known through the study of the torah. to add more to this even the world in all its entirety is not equivalent to a single word of the torah.

Getting back to the original question of “what is the smart way to give over a message without hurting anyone”,
humility and personal example go a long way. The following story-within-a-story from the Ben Ish Chai really makes this point:

The Reprover of Prague

A man came to town and said that he was the Reprover (mochiach) of Prague. The Reprover of Prague was world-famous in those days. The townspeople were excited over the rare opportunity to hear him speak. No one there had ever seen the Reprover of Prague in person, for Prague, a city in Central Europe, was very far. The town’s rabbi invited him to speak in the main synagogue on Shabbat. When the time came, everyone thronged to hear his sermon. Silence fell over them as he rose to speak.

“Gentlemen,” he began, “in the great city of Prague live many Jews, some of them very wealthy.
“The richest one of them owned fifteen vineyards, each of which was worth such and such, and which yielded a crop that brought in such and such per year. In addition, he owned twenty fields of grain. Field 1 yielded such and such per year. Field 2 yielded…. Field 3….
He owned thirty thousand heads of sheep. From the wool, he earned…. From the milk, he earned…. From the lambs, he earned…. He had a trade center with so-and-so many rooms and so-and-so many workers.
He had two hundred ships, from which he derived a monthly income of such and such. He held large-scale trading with England, France, and Italy.
At all times his safe held such and such gold, such and such silver, and such and such banknotes...

People were shifting in their seats and whispering to each other, “What is this all about? What does he want to say?” They were almost exploding to find out what this lengthy and detailed account of wealth could lead to.

At last he said, “All the wealth that I have just described to you was lost at once. Almost overnight, I was bared of everything that I had toiled all my life to amass. Yes, that rich man was I myself, and I am now penniless and broken. A living Job.”

The audience was visibly shaken. He paused for a moment.

Then he continued, “My story spread though the city. The Jews of Prague were shocked by what had befallen me, and the wealthy were hit the hardest. You could see it on them even physically. Instead of proudly strutting the streets of Prague, they bowed their heads and walked humbly. They said to one another, ‘If such a baron could suddenly lose everything, what shall we say for ourselves? How can we trust in our wealth and let it delude us into feeling superior? Something that can vanish in an instant is nothing to be proud of. And why should we put all our time and energy into pursuing such vanity? Instead we should pursue spiritual matters which will earn us lasting good!’
“As I said, my story made a big impact on the Jews of Prague. I became a lesson they could not forget. In fact, I believe that I moved people more than any darshan could have through citing Talmud and Midrash. I moved people even more than did the great Reprover of Prague. In a way, I became the Reprover of Prague. That is why I introduced myself here as such.

“I hope that my story has made an impression here as well, as it did in Prague, and that it will move people to pursue what really matters.”

With that he turned around and recited the customary Rabi Hananiah ben Akashiah omer and Kaddish Al Yisrael, as is done after a sermon.

The people left the synagogue speechless. Each one returned home, shaking his head and feeling betrayed by the vanity of this world. No one forgot the Reprover of Prague.

Great story!

I have chose not to post on every post , but on this i felt compelled to say something. This reminded me of a Gemara which one amora said to the other " is it about your lack of ability to learn torah you are crying about, not everyone is zocheh to two tables. "[financial and Torah]. I do not know the person talked about but i personally know people who you would be shocked about as being great people in jewish society , but rather then saying that you would be suprized about what a good person he is, say the positives about him. By aluding to the fact of a checkered pass that to me is wrong. [i apologize that i do not have the Gemara or amoraim on hand. if someone wants to shed ligth on gemara and amoraim before I look it up please do.

BS"D
Are we forgetting the story of the two brother tribes, living side by side in Eretz Yisrael. One learning Torah while his brother tribe worked to support him. Who's reward was greater? The one who worked. The pasuk/verse in Mishlei which says 'etz chaim hee l'machazikim bo' which means it (the holy Torah) is a tree of life for those who take hold in it' teach us something similar. The Vilna Gaon points out that it is a tree of life for those who are chizuk (a play on l'machazikim) by it, who are strengthening it. Our Rabbis z'l concluded that learning Torah is greater than action only because learning Torah leads to action. We learn from this the need to learn Torah but also to live according to the Torah. We also know that our Rabbis have said of one who learns but does not put his learning into action that it is better if the fetus turned over the the womb and he was never born. These are very strong words. Furthermore, one who conceals himself alone in a room and learns Torah all day all the time is a rasha/wicked person. Only Yonatan ben Uziel was allowed to learn constantly. A good character/one who has midos tovos is perhaps much greater than one who studies Torah but does not have a good character or put his Torah into action. Nevertheless, in the end it does not matter how much one learns, but how much he has done to fulfill and perhaps surpass his potential. If one is able to learn, or seek out a teacher to teach him how to learn and he does not it is of course on his head. Torah is important because from it we learn how to do HaShem's will, but if we don't do HaShem's will what is the point of learning Torah? Nevertheless, one should learn, for one who learns not for the sake of Heaven, his learning will eventually bring him to study for the sake of Heaven/l'shem shamayim.
The original topic “what is the smart way to give over a message without hurting anyone” can be addressed as follows: Rabbi Nachman tells us to look at the word for rebuke. That word is 'tochacha'. He tells us further to look at what is inside the word - the two middle letters. These letters are chet and hei. they have the numerical value/gematria of 8 and 5, respectively. Eight and five make the same numerical value as 'love'/ahavah = 13. Thus, what must be the central driving force when one gives rebuke to another is love for that person. When giving rebuke I must make it clear that I am giving it over for the other person's benefit.

When you wrote "One learning Torah while his brother tribe worked to support him.
Who's reward was greater? The one who worked. " This is wrong as it's brought in
Brachos 34b in no uncertain terms. Of course it's a great Mitzvah what they do, but it's all
in proportion. Do you really think Kollel yungerleit are idiots sitting and learning the
whole day when they can go out and make a lot of money and get more reward for
supporting some dunce whos its and learns and can't figure out that working on wall street
will make him more Schar.

When you wrote "We also know that our Rabbis have said of one who learns but does not
put his learning into action that it is better if the fetus turned over the the womb and he
was never born. These are very strong words. Furthermore, one who conceals himself
alone in a room and learns Torah all day all the time is a rasha/wicked person. " This is not
only wrong, but it borders on Apikorsis (also strong words.) What Chazal meant is on that
doesn't keep the Mitzvos (like those who wrote their Chidushei Torah on Shabbos while
smoking. Chas V'sholom to say that one who learns all day in his room is a RAsha. What
do you think the Vilna Goan (or any other Gadol does all day.) Sanhedrin 99b What is an
Apikoris? One who says what do Talmidai Chachumim do for us? They just learn for
themselves Rashi: They don't realize that the world exists because of them.

You wrote "Only Yonatan ben Uziel was allowed to learn constantly" It's nice of you for
giving him permission and not making him a Rasha