When a man grieves he tears his shirt, but this would not be appropriate for a woman, what can a woman do?

I recall seeing just a jacket collar torn on a man... perhaps a flap of womens' clothing could be torn or cut without it being a problem to her modesty?

This is what said in Moad Koton 22b as paraphrased by Kollel Iyun Hadaf

2. Men and women must both do Keri'ah

i. R. Shimon ben Elazar says that a woman rips the bottom garment, turns it around, and then rips the top garment (so as not to reveal herself).

(i) For other relatives it's OK to baste the rip after Shiv'ah and to sew it completely after Shloshim, but for a parent it is forbidden to baste until after Shloshim and it is forbidden to sew it completely forever. A woman may baste the rip immediately, for modesty.

From what I recall when family members sat shiva, the women immediately pinned up the tear with safety pins. They may also have worn something underneath, but I am not sure.

i know i should look this up in a dictionary, but what is basting? I have heard of basting a chicken, or a turkey, which is lightly brushing/covering it with oil, or something. In the case of clothes, does basting mean sewing a patch over the teared area?

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(i) For other relatives it's OK to baste the rip after Shiv'ah and to sew it completely after Shloshim, but for a parent it is forbidden to baste until after Shloshim and it is forbidden to sew it completely forever. A woman may baste the rip immediately, for modesty.

1baste \"bÀst\ vb bast•ed; bast•ing : to sew with long stitches so as to keep temporarily in place

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So, you see, the use of the word is not "basteless"

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So, you see, the use of the word is not "basteless" Smile

Sorry, but I cannot resist asking... how snog does each stitch get pulled?

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So, you see, the use of the word is not "basteless"

hehe